I’m sure I scared some people with last week’s blog. That wasn’t my intention, I felt I needed to be raw and real about my life here in Thailand. Autumn and I talked a lot about it and she told me I don’t have to be strong all the time, and I should share the raw frustrations sometimes with my supporters.
Here’s the crazy thing after I posted last week’s blog I laid down to take a nap, but instead of sleeping I thought. As I lay there in my rock hard bed, God met with me. He reminded me of so much, and in that I realized how happy I am to be here in Thailand. Here’s what I journaled:
“I’m just so happy God brought me here to Thailand. He’s done so much in me so far. He’s taught me to forgive more, and has given me new freedoms. He’s given me new friends and is slowly bringing us all closer together. I’m so happy He desires to draw me nearer to Him, and wants to give me more of His heart and eyes.
“Yeah this culture is hard, the spiritual warfare is draining, I’m tired all the time and I feel lonely a lot, but all that is temporary. This season won’t last forever. God’s love makes it worth it all.”
This past week has been better. I realized the majority of my problem was my focus. I was looking at the negatives of this season more than I was on the Lord. After I refocused, life got a little better, the causes of my frustrations weren’t necessarily removed, but they dimmed in comparison to the One who called me here. Thank you all for your prayers. It has rained once this past week. I have realized that I want to be here, and that all this time God has been bringing my heart here to Thailand. My prayer is that when I return to the States I will leave behind a piece of my heart rooted in this place.
