My band teacher used to say "blessed are the flexible, for they will not be bent out of shape." That is a theme that we will constantly be challenged with overseas. Life happens, expectations go unfulfilled, and we have to adjust. With that thought in mind our leaders here at training camp decided to challenge us the first night, because we might as well learn now.
Training camp is a four day camp in Georgia for all of the AIM teams before they are sent out. My Thailand team consists of 22 college women and two leaders. The first night we were insructed to grab 3 items because we would not have access to our bags untill the next morning. I wresteled with deciding what might be truly survival worthy and ended up grabbing a sweatshirt, pillow and headlamp. as we trecked out into the wilderness we were informed that we would be sleeping out in the wilderness. Grand.
The night was rough, to put it mildly. My bourndaries, and the things that I thought were important, were definitley changed. For one, the giant spiders that scurried across the tarp became non-issues in the face of the cold, hard sleeping quarters. Basically by the morning time I found myself spooning with three women that I had just met the day before under a flimsy sheet. I became accutly aware of unfulfilled expections and being flexible.
I have realized too that I have had some wrong expectations of this trip as well. In the excitement of the work that God will do through our team I have expected to be in the thick of the action. I have expected that If God will work it will be through me. I will get some of the glory, you see? I came to the realization that this was in the bottom of my heart when God asked me, "Mary, are you willing to scrub toilets in the girls home and enable your teammates to do the work? Are you willing to let me use you how I need, not how you would like?" God, no I want to be a part of the action, to be able to tell everyone what I did, or at least what you did through me. Again he spoke, "I am the potter, you are the clay. It is not your place to argue with me on how you will be used. It is enough that you hold the Spirit in your heart. Am I not enough of an award and honor for you?"
God change my heart into your heart. Let me be willing to do what you would have for me and let go of my own will. That may be my constant challenge over this trip. Breath out my own will, and breath in Christ's spirit.
