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Uncomfortable Chaos

Since I have committed myself to Christ, I have always said that nothing about Christianity is comfortable and it shouldn’t be. However, in the past, my discomfort came in the form of conversation with nonbelievers or being persecuted for being the way I am. I have come to realize that for these four months, I am experience discomfort physically. There is nothing comfortable about being here. There is nothing that makes you feel at home and there is at no one point that you can possibly predict what is going to come next in your day or week. The comfort that I experience when I am in the United States is completely banished from my life. 
 
And this is a good thing.
 
God has been teaching me through my discomfort to rely on him. To rely on my team. To see His work in me.  To see His work around me. To see Him in everything. God is using my discomfort to use me in the ways I was made to be used. Although being here has driven many emotions through my body, contentment settles over them all. I am happy where I am and I cannot imagine life elsewhere. But the discomfort of being here lurks below and in the past 5 weeks, I have finally come to see that is the way God is going to work on me and through me. As I deal with providing myself fake comfort in the form of counting down days, God deals with my discomfort through speaking truth into me and showing me the ways in which I am sharing His love. God uses my discomfort to pull me out of my shell, to break me down, put me back together again and then to further spread His love to all those I encounter.
 
And to think so much comes from such a negatively perceived feeling. Our God is so good.