I am stuggling to have faith. Its getting really difficult to see what God is doing and where He even is, it seems like everyday i get more discouraged. Trying to find Him in the little things isnt exactly working anymore and i feel like i am trapped somewhere that God cant reach me. This week has been one of the worst weeks of all of my life. Just struggling with things inside of my own heart and mind is tough. This week i struggled with just about everything you can think of- from self-pity, self-hatred, self-image, and just not wanting to get out of bed. Praying the same exact prayers...

When Peter stepped out of the boat to approach Jesus on the raging sea, I wonder if he felt regret.  Leaving behind a presumably safe vessel in exchange for the implausible prospect of walking on water seems crazy.  I wonder if the tempest burned his skin, or perhaps the chilly deluge saturated all the way to his heart.  It must have been challenging… in spite of Jesus’ physical presence, Peter started to doubt, and his feet sank.              My whole life I’ve chosen to live in a vessel composed...

We have been living in Phuket for two months now.  The honey moon period has ended, and while I still have moments of overwhelming gratitude for this ministry, passion has become episodic in nature.  Blogs are less frequent, and inspiration is harder to distinguish from everyday conventions.  All day everyday, we are pulling weeds and planting seeds- tasks which exhaust the body, fuel the Spirit, and humble our flesh.  Yet, there are times when the weeds seem to outnumber the seeds that God has given me.  It is in that moment- when I’ve thrown my last...

            Sometimes I get so caught up in desiring worldly favor that I forget the magnificence of brokenness- wherein resides the opportunity to be re-made.                           In sunshine, dust and dirt slowly gather; oil accumulates on paved roads, and smog clouds the air… but then something unexpected happens.  The clouds approach and let lose their tears.  Hundreds of glass beads shatter...

My team is extremely attracted to the rain. Here in Thailand, although it is opposite of the rainy season, it has rained everyday! GOD YOUR CRAZY! We all have our own reasons for loving it, for some of us its a reminder of faithfulness, for some its a sign of Gods power, some of us just really love it, and for me its a clensing refreshing thing. Everytime in my life when i have been broken, hurt, and feeling dirty– God has sent a gentle or torrential down pour my way for me to dance in! I remember one specific time in my life when i was the most hurt i have ever been. I was left...

I keep forgetting the power behind a smile and behind just telling someone that they are beautiful. We are doing so many great things here in Thailand and I know that i am apart of them but for me personally I have felt a little bit discouraged. I have met so many girls in the bars every week and i have asked many of them to hangout with me during the day and for some reason i keep hitting brick walls. I love them all so very much and its hard because i see my teammates going on dates and setting up times for them to come back to our house and get a job at S.H.E. but none of my friends...